A lot has happened since I last posted here.
1. In March 2013 Bob's instability and indecisiveness helped me reach a breaking point for my residency in Happy Camp and for the relationship. I became 100% determined to move and leave him, to the point that my emotions died. I truly felt emotionally flat and desperate to change my situation there.
2. I decided to move to Idaho, and proceeded to downsize. Bob wanted to go with me. I threw away bag after bag of needless things, gave things away, gave most of my books to the library book sale, gave writing books to the Chamber of Commerce, sold what was left of my furniture including my grandmother's bedroom set which I really didn't want to sell... but I realized the need to sell my furniture so I could move more easily. [It turned out to be a good idea.]
3. The day before my move to Idaho, Bob annoyed me for the last time by threatening to burn down the house with me in it, and I told him I never wanted to see him again. He finally (!) agreed to remove all his possessions from the U-Haul truck we were loading, and the house, and he vanished into my memory. I missed him for a while, but no longer do. I'm happy he's no longer part of my life. He is a narcissist and I needed peace of mind . . . and indeed, I do have peace of mind now.
4. I gave my car to Bob before he vanished. I gave my van to my son... neither were working well enough that I wanted responsibility for them anymore. I decided that I wanted to be car-less so I'd be forced to get more exercise - walking and cycling.
5. I drove myself to Idaho, but not before I nearly died from heat exhaustion while cleaning out the house I vacated.
6. I found a nice apartment in Post Falls, Idaho only hours before I would have been forced to live in a homeless shelter.
7. Two weeks later I walked into a church for the first time in many years, and gave my life and heart to Jesus.
8. I attended a lot of church services and Bible studies, and made new friends. All my closest friends here in Idaho are Christians.
9. I started the Book Lady YouTube Channel and made a lot of videos in 2014.
10. I was baptized on July 4, 2014. Freedom in Christ.
11. I trained myself to ride a bicycle and took a 37-mile bike journey on October 4, 2014. I rode on the North Idaho Centennial Trail from the Washington state line to the end of the trail on the eastern edge of Lake Coeur d'Alene.
12. Now I'm in the process of moving again, to another apartment in Post Falls. I'm leaving a ground floor apartment to live in a third floor apartment. . . and I'm very happy about that.
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Monday, February 25, 2013
The Newbery Challenge Rides Again!
I'm back to the Newbery Challenge! Almost twenty years ago I decided to read all the Newbery books, and now I'm inspired to get going on that again. So far I've read 42 out of 89 books, so I'm not even half-way there, and that's just the Newbery Medal WINNERS. I haven't counted the honor books and how many of them I've read. One of these days, I will. When I feel like I have more time on my hands, I guess.
I was inspired to read more of the Newbery books because I'm updating my Newbery pages online, starting with my page for the 1920's. My next job will be to do the page for the 60's, starting today. The reason why is that the 60's page is getting a lot more traffic than the other pages, so the squeaky wheel gets the grease.
I also started a blog for recording my impressions of the books I'm reading. I'll also be reviewing indie and small press books for teens and children. Yay!! I have a thing for children's literature!
I'm starting with the first Newbery book: The Story of Mankind
... it is a history book! In subsequent years fiction took over as the most common type of book honored by the Newbery Medal, but occasionally there are non-fiction books chosen as honor books. Some of them are excellent, too!
I've read enough books from the Newbery list to know that some of them are great and some, you just wonder why they were ever published, let alone chosen for this honor. As a writer of children's and teen's literature I believe luck and "who you know" count for something. And I read the good, the bad, and the ugly because it is all instructional for my career.
What's got me excited is that I have found communities of people doing the Newbery Challenge... one great group is at Goodreads, and I found out about 2 children's librarians (guys) that are doing a Newbery challenge with videos. I will also be doing videos!
I was inspired to read more of the Newbery books because I'm updating my Newbery pages online, starting with my page for the 1920's. My next job will be to do the page for the 60's, starting today. The reason why is that the 60's page is getting a lot more traffic than the other pages, so the squeaky wheel gets the grease.
I also started a blog for recording my impressions of the books I'm reading. I'll also be reviewing indie and small press books for teens and children. Yay!! I have a thing for children's literature!
I'm starting with the first Newbery book: The Story of Mankind
... it is a history book! In subsequent years fiction took over as the most common type of book honored by the Newbery Medal, but occasionally there are non-fiction books chosen as honor books. Some of them are excellent, too!
I've read enough books from the Newbery list to know that some of them are great and some, you just wonder why they were ever published, let alone chosen for this honor. As a writer of children's and teen's literature I believe luck and "who you know" count for something. And I read the good, the bad, and the ugly because it is all instructional for my career.
What's got me excited is that I have found communities of people doing the Newbery Challenge... one great group is at Goodreads, and I found out about 2 children's librarians (guys) that are doing a Newbery challenge with videos. I will also be doing videos!
Monday, July 30, 2012
Busy Web Work... Despite the Stress
I've had a busy week... lots of work, and the community activities. My work is website development. Right now I've got lots of sites to work on. I don't do rush orders but rotate my web maintenance duties... with an intention of doing updates on every site every month. To do that, I need to work on three sites each day.
Really, it isn't hard... but it is constant.
Every weekend I have community activities. On Saturdays I go to the community drum circle at the local dreamcatcher. Our dreamcatcher is thirty feet across... very impressive. We sit under it to drum.
My life has been extremely stressful this month. I've noticed that too much stress takes the joy out of living. It caught up with me at the drum circle on Saturday. For a change, I didn't want to stay. Usually I want to stay beyond the time when everyone else wants to leave. This time I wanted to leave first. I was thinking, "Gaaa... where has my enthusiasm gone?"
Today at the writer's club meeting I did better. I managed to forget my troubles and write two short stories. One was about aliens - one of my favorite flash fiction topics.
The other story was shorter - about a woman falsely accused of drug smuggling, inspired by my current obsession with watching old episodes of "Locked Up Abroad" (a National Geographic Channel show.)
This evening after the meeting I worked on three more sites. One of them was a forum. I upgraded to the most recent version of phpBB, installed a new theme, which is white (I love)... also checked stats and was thrilled with lots of search engine traffic, installed advertising, and made a new header graphic for the site. I also interfaced it with my new Prayer Power website.
Earlier today I was meditating about my work, and got an inspiration that one of my websites would become an important site, somehow. Honestly, at this time I can't see it. I can only go ahead and develop it and see what happens. I'm looking for all sorts of ways to create new income streams... I so want to close some of my other sites. I'm looking for change.
Really, it isn't hard... but it is constant.
Every weekend I have community activities. On Saturdays I go to the community drum circle at the local dreamcatcher. Our dreamcatcher is thirty feet across... very impressive. We sit under it to drum.
My life has been extremely stressful this month. I've noticed that too much stress takes the joy out of living. It caught up with me at the drum circle on Saturday. For a change, I didn't want to stay. Usually I want to stay beyond the time when everyone else wants to leave. This time I wanted to leave first. I was thinking, "Gaaa... where has my enthusiasm gone?"
Today at the writer's club meeting I did better. I managed to forget my troubles and write two short stories. One was about aliens - one of my favorite flash fiction topics.
The other story was shorter - about a woman falsely accused of drug smuggling, inspired by my current obsession with watching old episodes of "Locked Up Abroad" (a National Geographic Channel show.)
This evening after the meeting I worked on three more sites. One of them was a forum. I upgraded to the most recent version of phpBB, installed a new theme, which is white (I love)... also checked stats and was thrilled with lots of search engine traffic, installed advertising, and made a new header graphic for the site. I also interfaced it with my new Prayer Power website.
Earlier today I was meditating about my work, and got an inspiration that one of my websites would become an important site, somehow. Honestly, at this time I can't see it. I can only go ahead and develop it and see what happens. I'm looking for all sorts of ways to create new income streams... I so want to close some of my other sites. I'm looking for change.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Who You Are is Who I Am
I'm going to use this space to sound off today. Yes, I feel a rant coming on.
First, I want to emphasize that my world is a reflection of what I am.
That guy across the room who I invited into my life space is a part of me.
So if I complain about him, I'm complaining about me.
If I criticize him, I'm criticizing a part of myself because obviously, I wanted him here for some reason. He completed me and I just had to have him.
Why do we do these things to ourselves?
We're here to learn.
It isn't always easy, nor should it be.
We learn more from what pains us than from fun and games.
So, take your pick.
I obviously chose to learn from various types of suffering... but today I'm calling one particular suffering out... and that is abandonment.
Yes, abandonment.
I've been abandoned repeatedly during this lifetime, and it has happened again.
There have been times I was abandoned due to no fault of my own except my own unenlightened non-seeing of reality. There have been other times I was abandoned because I had a meltdown.
Gosh, how imperfect can I get?
But eventually you have to see that the meltdowns, the bad, the negatives, the mistakes you make, the errors, the pathetic imperfections - they are all part of the learning process.
From this you / I / we become the people we were intended to be.
These errors are the food of wisdom.
* * *
I have two predictions today.
(1) During 2013 we will totally recover from our fear of 2012, and
(2) During 2013 we will collectively work much more enthusiastically on creating a better future for the creatures of this planet.
* * *
Now we as human beings must remember........... we are not alone.
We are togetherness personified.
We are human beings. A group. You could say, a soul group. A cluster.
Related.
When we get angry at someone else it is the same as getting angry at a part of ourselves.
When a part of ourselves abandons us... it means you can learn more from that pain than from the part that left.
The pain becomes part of you instead.
The loss becomes part of you.
And from that, new wisdom blooms.
Your heart is opened a little wider.
You become the amazing being you were intended to be.
Goodbye old friends. Hello new me.
What an amazing blessing!
First, I want to emphasize that my world is a reflection of what I am.
That guy across the room who I invited into my life space is a part of me.
So if I complain about him, I'm complaining about me.
If I criticize him, I'm criticizing a part of myself because obviously, I wanted him here for some reason. He completed me and I just had to have him.
Why do we do these things to ourselves?
We're here to learn.
It isn't always easy, nor should it be.
We learn more from what pains us than from fun and games.
So, take your pick.
I obviously chose to learn from various types of suffering... but today I'm calling one particular suffering out... and that is abandonment.
Yes, abandonment.
I've been abandoned repeatedly during this lifetime, and it has happened again.
There have been times I was abandoned due to no fault of my own except my own unenlightened non-seeing of reality. There have been other times I was abandoned because I had a meltdown.
Gosh, how imperfect can I get?
But eventually you have to see that the meltdowns, the bad, the negatives, the mistakes you make, the errors, the pathetic imperfections - they are all part of the learning process.
From this you / I / we become the people we were intended to be.
These errors are the food of wisdom.
* * *
I have two predictions today.
(1) During 2013 we will totally recover from our fear of 2012, and
(2) During 2013 we will collectively work much more enthusiastically on creating a better future for the creatures of this planet.
* * *
Now we as human beings must remember........... we are not alone.
We are togetherness personified.
We are human beings. A group. You could say, a soul group. A cluster.
Related.
When we get angry at someone else it is the same as getting angry at a part of ourselves.
When a part of ourselves abandons us... it means you can learn more from that pain than from the part that left.
The pain becomes part of you instead.
The loss becomes part of you.
And from that, new wisdom blooms.
Your heart is opened a little wider.
You become the amazing being you were intended to be.
Goodbye old friends. Hello new me.
What an amazing blessing!
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
The Sad Story of 2011... How I Let My Business Suffer
Popularity is a double-edged sword. Last year I was a little too popular. I was elected to the local Chamber of Commerce board of directors and made corresponding secretary. I attended all the meetings and helped with event planning. And in the end I came up with an important lesson: Guard Your Small Business Management Time.
You see, my business was suffering. I was working more for the community than I was for LJ Martin Web. That's the name of my licensed home business, and there's only one worker bee there - and that's me! When I'm not home working on my business, nobody is! Eek... so while I was kindly helping others I was undermining my own income.
That had to end. I quit my board membership and secretarial position. It shocked everyone... but it had to be done. I went my own way, got back into my regularly scheduled business time, and patched my income back together. Really, that year was a huge setback as I lost a lot of income because my mind was elsewhere.
You know how some businesses are owned by one person and operated by employees? Well, my business isn't that way. It is totally a one-woman show. Nobody helps, not even my best friend, though I've tried and tried to get some help from him. He just won't... so it is up to me. And only me.
So, I pushed back the plate. Popularity is not for me when it involves neglecting my own business interests. Time is money, as they say. To make money, you need to take the time.
You see, my business was suffering. I was working more for the community than I was for LJ Martin Web. That's the name of my licensed home business, and there's only one worker bee there - and that's me! When I'm not home working on my business, nobody is! Eek... so while I was kindly helping others I was undermining my own income.
That had to end. I quit my board membership and secretarial position. It shocked everyone... but it had to be done. I went my own way, got back into my regularly scheduled business time, and patched my income back together. Really, that year was a huge setback as I lost a lot of income because my mind was elsewhere.
You know how some businesses are owned by one person and operated by employees? Well, my business isn't that way. It is totally a one-woman show. Nobody helps, not even my best friend, though I've tried and tried to get some help from him. He just won't... so it is up to me. And only me.
So, I pushed back the plate. Popularity is not for me when it involves neglecting my own business interests. Time is money, as they say. To make money, you need to take the time.
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Journey! California... again.
I completely wiped my website, Journey California, clean... once again. This is the THIRD time.
The first site was on Geocities. Remember that?
The second was on my own domain but it was a disaster and I didn't know what to do with it. It featured a static page and two blogs.
The third time it was built on Drupal. That's the one I deleted tonight, but I saved all the articles. Well, I have articles saved from way back when it was on Geocities!
This afternoon and evening I worked hard to repair the damage. I installed a WordPress blog and posted two of my old articles.
Dunsmuir – Train Town! was from the old, old site... I've added two much newer videos and some update notes.
The other re-posted article, Happy in Happy Camp is an article I wrote in 2011 for a Southern California newspaper.
It will take a while before I can restore the rest of the site...
The first site was on Geocities. Remember that?
The second was on my own domain but it was a disaster and I didn't know what to do with it. It featured a static page and two blogs.
The third time it was built on Drupal. That's the one I deleted tonight, but I saved all the articles. Well, I have articles saved from way back when it was on Geocities!
This afternoon and evening I worked hard to repair the damage. I installed a WordPress blog and posted two of my old articles.
Dunsmuir – Train Town! was from the old, old site... I've added two much newer videos and some update notes.
The other re-posted article, Happy in Happy Camp is an article I wrote in 2011 for a Southern California newspaper.
It will take a while before I can restore the rest of the site...
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Writing Memoir, or Autobiography Contemplation
For several years I've been entranced by the idea of writing a great memoir, or autobiography. This is an up and coming popular genre and I've given it a few good starts. One year I decided to write autobiography for NaNoWriMo and came out with 50K of mush. I called it The Green Tea Chronicles but I may pull the name and give it to something else. Undecided at this time.
Later I studied a great memoir writing book, Your Life As Story, and discovered that memoirs are better if focused on only a small section of the journey of life. So I thought deeply on that and came up with the idea of writing about my time in an organized religion... which my daughter still belongs to. She didn't think this was a good idea. I'm not so sure. So the jury is still out on whether that story will ever be written.
I have a lot of stories wrapped up inside of me... but for now I'm publishing fiction. My novel, River Girl, will be published soon.
Perhaps I should continue with the autobiographical writing, and memoirs, and then never publish them. The remnants could allow someone else to write my biography someday. I have to admire people who write great biographies. It must be much more difficult to do research and write about other people's lives, not your own. In comparison, all one has to do for autobiography is open a vein and let the blood flow. It puddles up on the paper and a story is revealed.
The most important thing, of course, is to just keep writing. Talking about it doesn't help a bit. Only printed words count.
Later I studied a great memoir writing book, Your Life As Story, and discovered that memoirs are better if focused on only a small section of the journey of life. So I thought deeply on that and came up with the idea of writing about my time in an organized religion... which my daughter still belongs to. She didn't think this was a good idea. I'm not so sure. So the jury is still out on whether that story will ever be written.
I have a lot of stories wrapped up inside of me... but for now I'm publishing fiction. My novel, River Girl, will be published soon.
Perhaps I should continue with the autobiographical writing, and memoirs, and then never publish them. The remnants could allow someone else to write my biography someday. I have to admire people who write great biographies. It must be much more difficult to do research and write about other people's lives, not your own. In comparison, all one has to do for autobiography is open a vein and let the blood flow. It puddles up on the paper and a story is revealed.
The most important thing, of course, is to just keep writing. Talking about it doesn't help a bit. Only printed words count.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Winter Chill
I really feel I have not much to complain about - but this winter chill is so hard to get rid of! I live in a somewhat mild climate - far-northern California woods, a low sort of mountain range, actually the Southern Cascades, but also called the Klamath Siskiyou Mountains. There really isn't much snow here and when we get a few inches it melts. So who am I to complain about winter chill?
I live in an insulated cabin. I spend most of my time in a corner of my bedroom typing my heart out on this computer... for cash. Got to do it... this is my only income. Well, my dearheart spends most of his time on the opposite end of the cabin next to the woodstove. Thankfully he creates the fire each morning and takes care of all the firewood issues. That warms up the cabin and a bit of it eventually makes its way back to me.
Meanwhile - Brrrrrr! My little space heater (one of the tiny ones) really doesn't keep me quite as warm as I'd like. Solution: bundle up. I'm about to go put on my sweater so I can quit complaining about the winter chill.
I live in an insulated cabin. I spend most of my time in a corner of my bedroom typing my heart out on this computer... for cash. Got to do it... this is my only income. Well, my dearheart spends most of his time on the opposite end of the cabin next to the woodstove. Thankfully he creates the fire each morning and takes care of all the firewood issues. That warms up the cabin and a bit of it eventually makes its way back to me.
Meanwhile - Brrrrrr! My little space heater (one of the tiny ones) really doesn't keep me quite as warm as I'd like. Solution: bundle up. I'm about to go put on my sweater so I can quit complaining about the winter chill.
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