Monday, July 30, 2012

Busy Web Work... Despite the Stress

I've had a busy week... lots of work, and the community activities. My work is website development. Right now I've got lots of sites to work on. I don't do rush orders but rotate my web maintenance duties... with an intention of doing updates on every site every month. To do that, I need to work on three sites each day.

Really, it isn't hard... but it is constant.

Every weekend I have community activities. On Saturdays I go to the community drum circle at the local dreamcatcher. Our dreamcatcher is thirty feet across... very impressive. We sit under it to drum.

My life has been extremely stressful this month. I've noticed that too much stress takes the joy out of living. It caught up with me at the drum circle on Saturday. For a change, I didn't want to stay. Usually I want to stay beyond the time when everyone else wants to leave. This time I wanted to leave first. I was thinking, "Gaaa... where has my enthusiasm gone?"

Today at the writer's club meeting I did better. I managed to forget my troubles and write two short stories. One was about aliens - one of my favorite flash fiction topics.

The other story was shorter - about a woman falsely accused of drug smuggling, inspired by my current obsession with watching old episodes of "Locked Up Abroad" (a National Geographic Channel show.)

This evening after the meeting I worked on three more sites. One of them was a forum. I upgraded to the most recent version of phpBB, installed a new theme, which is white (I love)... also checked stats and was thrilled with lots of search engine traffic, installed advertising, and made a new header graphic for the site. I also interfaced it with my new Prayer Power website.

Earlier today I was meditating about my work, and got an inspiration that one of my websites would become an important site, somehow. Honestly, at this time I can't see it. I can only go ahead and develop it and see what happens. I'm looking for all sorts of ways to create new income streams... I so want to close some of my other sites. I'm looking for change.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Who You Are is Who I Am

I'm going to use this space to sound off today. Yes, I feel a rant coming on.

First, I want to emphasize that my world is a reflection of what I am.

That guy across the room who I invited into my life space is a part of me.

So if I complain about him, I'm complaining about me.

If I criticize him, I'm criticizing a part of myself because obviously, I wanted him here for some reason. He completed me and I just had to have him.

Why do we do these things to ourselves?

We're here to learn.

It isn't always easy, nor should it be.

We learn more from what pains us than from fun and games.

So, take your pick.

I obviously chose to learn from various types of suffering... but today I'm calling one particular suffering out... and that is abandonment.

Yes, abandonment.

I've been abandoned repeatedly during this lifetime, and it has happened again.

There have been times I was abandoned due to no fault of my own except my own unenlightened non-seeing of reality. There have been other times I was abandoned because I had a meltdown.

Gosh, how imperfect can I get?

But eventually you have to see that the meltdowns, the bad, the negatives, the mistakes you make, the errors, the pathetic imperfections - they are all part of the learning process.

From this you / I / we become the people we were intended to be.

These errors are the food of wisdom.

* * *

I have two predictions today.

(1) During 2013 we will totally recover from our fear of 2012, and

(2) During 2013 we will collectively work much more enthusiastically on creating a better future for the creatures of this planet.

* * *

Now we as human beings must remember........... we are not alone.

We are togetherness personified.

We are human beings. A group. You could say, a soul group. A cluster.

Related.

When we get angry at someone else it is the same as getting angry at a part of ourselves.

When a part of ourselves abandons us... it means you can learn more from that pain than from the part that left.

The pain becomes part of you instead.

The loss becomes part of you.

And from that, new wisdom blooms.

Your heart is opened a little wider.

You become the amazing being you were intended to be.

Goodbye old friends. Hello new me.

What an amazing blessing!

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Sad Story of 2011... How I Let My Business Suffer

Popularity is a double-edged sword. Last year I was a little too popular. I was elected to the local Chamber of Commerce board of directors and made corresponding secretary. I attended all the meetings and helped with event planning. And in the end I came up with an important lesson: Guard Your Small Business Management Time.

You see, my business was suffering. I was working more for the community than I was for LJ Martin Web. That's the name of my licensed home business, and there's only one worker bee there - and that's me! When I'm not home working on my business, nobody is! Eek... so while I was kindly helping others I was undermining my own income.

That had to end. I quit my board membership and secretarial position. It shocked everyone... but it had to be done. I went my own way, got back into my regularly scheduled business time, and patched my income back together. Really, that year was a huge setback as I lost a lot of income because my mind was elsewhere.

You know how some businesses are owned by one person and operated by employees? Well, my business isn't that way. It is totally a one-woman show. Nobody helps, not even my best friend, though I've tried and tried to get some help from him. He just won't... so it is up to me. And only me.

So, I pushed back the plate. Popularity is not for me when it involves neglecting my own business interests. Time is money, as they say. To make money, you need to take the time.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Journey! California... again.

I completely wiped my website, Journey California, clean... once again. This is the THIRD time.

The first site was on Geocities. Remember that?

The second was on my own domain but it was a disaster and I didn't know what to do with it. It featured a static page and two blogs.

The third time it was built on Drupal. That's the one I deleted tonight, but I saved all the articles. Well, I have articles saved from way back when it was on Geocities!

This afternoon and evening I worked hard to repair the damage. I installed a WordPress blog and posted two of my old articles.

Dunsmuir – Train Town! was from the old, old site... I've added two much newer videos and some update notes.

The other re-posted article, Happy in Happy Camp is an article I wrote in 2011 for a Southern California newspaper.

It will take a while before I can restore the rest of the site...

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Writing Memoir, or Autobiography Contemplation

For several years I've been entranced by the idea of writing a great memoir, or autobiography. This is an up and coming popular genre and I've given it a few good starts. One year I decided to write autobiography for NaNoWriMo and came out with 50K of mush. I called it The Green Tea Chronicles but I may pull the name and give it to something else. Undecided at this time.

Later I studied a great memoir writing book, Your Life As Story, and discovered that memoirs are better if focused on only a small section of the journey of life. So I thought deeply on that and came up with the idea of writing about my time in an organized religion... which my daughter still belongs to. She didn't think this was a good idea. I'm not so sure. So the jury is still out on whether that story will ever be written.

I have a lot of stories wrapped up inside of me... but for now I'm publishing fiction. My novel, River Girl, will be published soon.

Perhaps I should continue with the autobiographical writing, and memoirs, and then never publish them. The remnants could allow someone else to write my biography someday. I have to admire people who write great biographies. It must be much more difficult to do research and write about other people's lives, not your own. In comparison, all one has to do for autobiography is open a vein and let the blood flow. It puddles up on the paper and a story is revealed.

The most important thing, of course, is to just keep writing. Talking about it doesn't help a bit. Only printed words count.